Welcome To My Blog

Welcome to my blog. Whatever the reason you have chosen to visit my website I hope you find it useful and informative. The words I have written come not only from my training and ongoing studies, but from my own experiences in life and from the struggles of each and every person who has shared Continue reading »

The Red Flags Of Dating

This post is written in response to many requests from my clients who want to find someone to spend their life with but have become disillusioned with the whole process of dating. The thing I seem to hear most is, “How can I find the right person?”. The sub-text of this, of course, is “How Continue reading »

“I’m Sorry”

Relationships are a source of soothing and stimulation and help us to feel less alone in the world. We are hard wired to be social as our chances of survival are greatly increased if we belong to groups. In these groups (even a group of two) we need to feel safe, that they are not Continue reading »

What is Incongruence?

What is incongruence?  Imagine being a child and one day your parents bring home a new baby. Suddenly you receive less attention and are told to “be quiet”. The baby gets lots of attention, not only from parents but from every visitor. You may feel abandoned, rejected, hurt, angry, confused, bored and ignored. You are Continue reading »

How To Listen Effectively

Listening effectively, in a way where the other person feels heard and understood is not the same as hearing. Our relationships and social interactions can be greatly improved by using Active Listening, the purpose of which is to Observe, Understand and Reflect. Observe: If we really pay attention when someone is talking we may notice Continue reading »

Working With Loss – Sitting With the Helplessness

How many times do people decide to see a counsellor/psychotherapist because they are depressed, anxious, experiencing relationship difficulties, numbing their pain with addiction etc? These are the difficulties people or those around them notice, difficulties that prompt them into getting help. Often, as I listen to clients and explore with them what it is like Continue reading »